My Joy!

http://faculty.gordon.edu/hu/bi/ted_hildebrandt/otesources/20-proverbs/text/books/bridges-proverbscommentary/bridges-proverbs.htm

If truth is marching...

Where are the Grapes of wrath stored?

Curses undone by the grace of God...

On pacifiers and the pancreas?

Could it be that too much sucking on the pacifier is actually dangerous?  Swallowing saliva all day might have some ramifications, I only imagine.   Gum chewing and pacifier sucking are quite similar in their effects I think.  We don't get to the root of the problem of anxiety in the child's experience.  Lots of saliva and lots of anxiety are the fruit of childcare hopping.  We are focusing on the need for childcare and the need of parents to work outside the home and not on the emotional and physical wellbeing of the child.  Who's health is being impacted.  Is childhood diabetes and other pancreatic disfunction related to this change in our culture.  It is amazing that we know who and how many individuals have had complications of he COVID and for years we haven't even seen the relationship between cultural changes namely mothers in the workforce so early and deaths from cancer and increases in diabetes and other ailments.  We must investigate the correlations and see if we can't rectify this and turn that curve around as well. 

What is Gone?

Who cares what was Gone with the Wind?

Beauty, gone.

Culture, gone,

Safety, gone.,

Men, gone.

Decorum, gone.

Etc.

To be replaced with what!

Ungenteel evolutionism.

“We built this culture!”  Anglo, Euro, American, polite society! They seem to scream incessantly.  I don’t blame their sad and sullen embrace of the prereconstructionist south.  It was beautiful.  Hauntingly beautiful so that long after it was plowed to the ground the characters who beautified the landscape told their stories to the mourning of a pre war country.  

I was never southern and I have never had much respect for the supposed culture that was being mourned in my ears through my civil rights era minds eye.

It was better then, they sang more and more loudly. Why can’t people see that.  It was better for some and it was worse for some.

I was a student of Steinbeck and I see now that his stoic realism was more in line with the America that I experienced and saw the fruit of and heard the stories about.  Raw and city.  The southern decorum was a myth hat I had never even heard the stories about.  I do believe the stories of a culture that had risen to such expressions of beauty and lucidity .  I believe that the teenagers had time to beautify themselves and learn piety and poise.  Other people were enslaved to allow them this privilege.  That is true and when God snatched it out of their paws they couldn’t believe that it was as though it had been a dream.  The depression came trampling upon this country with a vengeance.  The culture was razed to the dust.

Chapter one of the book makes me jealous and angry, but I press on.  I have no right to be jealous of a girl of privilege or a culture not my own.  None of us deserve the privileges to which we were born.  I do not appreciate the inheritance of culture that I was bequeathed.  It was a beauty of storytelling that is hauntingly beautiful and it belongs to all of us.  

I couldn’t believe that until Hamilton.  All of our hands were at the plow to create the memories that were woven into our American History.  We can all play the parts because we inherited the catastroph of the tower of Babyl that fell on that fateful day.  

“Frankly Scarlet…”. Who cares?  We all care. But we all don’t know from whence we have fallen.  The biblical knowledge that grew the decorum that was the precision war southeast a divine gift or a loan and what we do with it is everybody’s responsibility, much like our economy or the engineering of the wondrous subway system that makes me smile. The decorum and culture of southern life is a Biblical gift. It is tended by the garden of a couple of generations of people who were enlightened by the golden rule and other dear portions of scripture that are blinded in other areas of the country.  Like a beautiful flower garden with secrets that observation cannot teach you, that is the southern cultural beauty.  We must let the south teach the rest of the country the things that God has taught them.  Do not despise the day of small things and the details of humble submission and respect for providence.  I am very aware of the pride of the south as I am of my own northern pride, but I am choosing to focus on the image of God that I see in stark contrast to my own northern krassness.  Help Lord as I delve into this book to put my emotions aside and learn of You what was “Gone with the Wind”. Amen.

Feeding my Frenzy!

A Fool and His money is soon parted, my father would say to me.  Except, this morning it wasn't money it was 2 eggs in a carton of 18 with a dozen in the other carton that was burning a hole in my pocket.  I must do something.  I wanted the muffins that Enoch brought in that were nicely wrapped and in a big box, but I haven't got them anymore.  They were eaten and to pay me back for having eaten his muffins, he ate my wonderful bran and pumpkin seed cereal, which was a gift for teacher appreciation week.  I have 1/2 a bag of pumpkin seed cereal and two eggs and some clabba milk and what else.  about 2 cups of flour in a bag with a whole untouched bag of flour to boot.

I must tell you it was an AHAA moment!  I pulled out my Better Homes and Gardens cookbook.  This was not a task for Rhee Drummond, this was a day of improvisation with bits of this and bits of that in it.  Muffins?  What kind of muffins?  I haven't a whole cup of anything in particular.  If they don't eat them, I will wrap them in a box and eat one at a time, as though En had bought them from the store.  Anyway, they always tear into the whole batch before I can get a taste.

I found a recipe for Bran Cereal Muffins.  I was certain that I had about a third of a bag of Allbran left from my banana bread recipe, two weeks ago.  So I began my morning search for the ingredients.

1 cup of boiling water was the easiest to find, because I always boil water when I am washing the dishes
3 cups of whole bran cereal(not flakes)
I was sure that I had that, but En had eaten the bag down to one cup.  Uhoh!
I have already begun the process and there isn't any Allbran, and there isn't but 1 cup of that designer bran cereal that I got from teacher appreciation week.
I put the Wheat germ and the bran cereal together with the boiling water and hoped for the best!

I nearly cussed when I had to search high and low for the cinnamon in the cabinet.  I said, Emily would never have let the cabinets get this discombobulated.  Thank you for all you do!

Well, anyway, the whole house is smelling of a delicious sort of unusual combination!  I know you don't eat eggs or dairy, but you would be proud of me clearing the fridge of half of the items that we use, to make what is hopefully my greatest muffin creation.  I threw in the chocolate half of the smores that were in the freezer,  just in case the last of the sugar wasn't enough to sweeten the brew.


MMMM it smells good and it looks okay, we will see, what becomes of us, when we devour them...

Perry Como's And I Love You, "SO"

And I Love you “So”

{this happened years ago}

So,  became my name, because of the uncaring attitude that became mine in the light of great responsibility.

Ie.

You didnt get that done?

My answer, SO!

SOmeone was offended by you doing this or that?

My answer, SO!

I didn’t know Granddaddy was so aware of how hard it was to carry the weight of being the eldest child until he died.  I nearly died with him.  That would have been appropriate, I think.  Seeing that he was the one person who I hated, who I never told that I hated him.

He answered my every scream in that song.  I heard it in Harris Teeter and I could see him right in front of me all the way through the store.  I wanted to push him aside and tell him, you know that I hate you, but the tears were flowing so much that I just had to keep walking.

I know you hate me, but this one is for you!

Every word sunk deep into my pained and broken soul.  Why didn’t you take your responsibility?  Why would you throw that stuff on us?  I couldn’t even ask him that in the context.  

I couldn’t tell you then and you couldn’t tell me, then, but we do love each other, don’t we.  And we died together.  And you will be able to get up from this, won’t you!  Okay I love you!

And I love you SO, though people ask me how,(How could I love you when you run around hating on people like you do)  You fight like a barnyard dog and you cuss like a sailor.  Can’t you do anything about her?

How have I lived in her good graces and not received a lashing like everybody else?

How come she doesn’t sass you, like she does everybody else?

I tell them, I don’t know!

I am explaining to you how much I understand the wrath of your life.

“So” You were a barnyard fighter who grew into a judgmental little “so and so”.  I really don’t know which I like worse the sinner or the saint “So”.  I know that our relationship is now and then. I looked all over heaven and I didn’t find one prayer for me.  I knew you never preached to me, like you did to everyone else.  But, I didn’t think that you never even prayed for me.  Thank God, somebody did.  You never forgave me and you never talked about your anger to me, but you know what.  I love you “So”!

Thank God there is forgiveness with God! 

The Beauty of Words?

The Beauty of using a multitude of words

One of the beautiful things that I am learning from growing into a Charlotine is the beauty of using words to express things in verbosity.  It is a southern thing.

A New Yorker uses gestures and a word.  Perhaps a glance and a shove, might work if the gesture didn't but the multitude of words that these people use are delightful to watch.  Tones of voice and imploring sentences repeated, just for effect has been a conundrum to me.  WHY?  Why do they talk so much?  Why do they repeat the same sentence, inside the same sentence and I have to unpack the meaning of a repetition before the verb and a repetition after the verb, means several different things.

I have never been verbose or loquacious, but I admire from a great distance the power of imploring and implications that don’t really mean what you meant.  Letting people stew in their own misunderstanding of a thing that you took so very long to say.  It is an art that I do often wish were a part of my upbringing.

Many days, I miss the power of pounding the money on the counter at the post office and not having to say anything but 10 or 12 meaning stamps and getting just what you want.  I love that woman, for knowing what I meant, without getting offended.

The art of underlining your phrases and underscoring your inferences is beautiful, when you look at it from a distance.  I love thinking about it and I love hearing the sentences from the southern verbiage and processing them from my northern ear.  I think of it as a transplanting dilemma.

Earrings and makeup!

Do You hear what I hear?  I have my earrings on!

I am listening for that still small voice from God and I am reminded from the earrings and the necklaces and the makeup to put on the whole armor of God and be prepared to see and be seen! Thank you!

Is the Lord my shepherd or not? {regrets for not siezing the day when reading the Lord is my Shepherd for the 59th time}

No Grandma, lets not read the Lord Is My Shepherd tonight…

Let’s read it tomorrow…  His eyes implored with such a longing to read about the rest of the universe.  I gave in, but I did not know that the devil was imploring him to implore me.  Will you have another chance to talk about Jesus and to show His mercy again?  Is Jesus’ provision boring?  Is there something else more important than the Lord being my shepherd, even when you are four years old?  That is LOT’S wife’s spirit who listens and gives in to the children on things of God.  

You are the child and God’s word commands us to listen, whenever and wherever we are.  That is the beauty of a saved Moabitess woman.  I learned from my grandma that whenever somebody says do God’s stuff tomorrow that is the devil and we must never listen to that spirit. That is some of the soap in the washout of Sodom.  No!  We stop what we are doing when God’s lightning and thunder are commanding.  We stop whatever we are doing when God’s Word is discussed and we listen.  We may not know all the theological reasons why, but we have commanded our spirits to be subject to God in wherever and whatever course we are.  The angel told Lots wife not to turn and she didn’t listen.  I think it was the cries of her children and the children of the city that turned her.  God’s allegiance is supposed to be greater.  Greater than my greatest love for my children and grandchildren.  They were upstairs and we couldn’t get them out of the house in time.  Maybe I can convince the angel to take another trip back to pick them up, so they won’t be burnt and lost to the flames of the city.

Save yourself!  Can I save myself when my children are in the city?  That is the sin that I think about when they say Lot’s wife .  Jesus was Lot’s wife attached to her sin or to her children?  He said remember her.  People say she backslid.  There wasn’t time and there isn’t time to wait until tomorrow to read The Lord is My Shepherd.

What are we developing their minds to accomplish?  Don’t take Jeremiah in the car with you! I have to read to him. No we have him now.  There is no other day but today for them to do what is godly.  He taught each of those children how to distract Mrs. Jayne from her dearest love and they already knew how.  But I gave in because they had had close reigns on them for the whole day.  They are tricking you, my sister Jacqueline would tell me.  They look so genuine in their concern for something else.  That is the foolishness that is bound in the child that he prefers random to structured from the womb.  It is our job to structure their thinking and the first structure is to know that every time God is brought up there must be no discussion about it.

Some mothers get high on the authority of speaking for God and say, whatever I say is of the Lord and you must submit to all that I say as if the angels were coming to take your soul.  That burns the children out.  And some like me build priorities in their consciences.  This is neutral and that is convenience and this is worldly perspective, but when God’s word is brought up, don’t ask me to dissuade.  That is what I saw Jacqueline McCullough do in AZuza years ago.  She took a long time and a lot of the attention of the audience to show all of the things that she had learned from upper education about she he and it terminology. This is the line she drew that we can discuss the theories of communication of the millennial day where we live.  But when God says that someone is in sin and will receive the recompense for their deeds of conformity to a norm of Homosexuality or neutrality on these things,  there is no discussion about that.  She went where they were and I kept saying to myself, why is she legitimizing this ambiguous usage of gender neutrality in personal pronouns.  I was praying for understanding and when I understood, I was on board.

“We are sending our children to Sodom to learn and to socialize and they have to go in there with the ability to use the pronouns that their counterparts use.  They can’t speak in King James and she was giving an example of how we conform to the usages where necessary, but draw the line at acceptance of the behaviors.  I can be your friend, but I cannot and will not get in the car with the devil, Jeremiah.  The Lord is my Shepherd is giving you a tool to see God, in whatever den of iniquity you might find yourself in.  Look for the book about Jesus.  Look for the web sight that talks about Jesus’ mercy on that tablet.  find a song that tells you about God’s love when you hear that song that you were trying to take the class to.  Let those demon thoughts go, when you are with me and hear what Jesus has to say.  Mrs. Jayne loves me enough to be implored by me to take another path for a moment and sometimes that isn’t sin to condescend into their silliness.  But sometimes it is sin!

Whenever the next generation of our family is being born...

Keep peace and peaceful thoughts through your mind the week before delivery.  This is my initial thought.  I know that you can’t control all of your circumstances, but you have your future and the future within your body. What an awesome task to deliver the future?  Can you imagine it?  Imagine it for the glory of God. Imagine that God is going to do great things in your child’s lifetime.  Peace and safety are what we are wishing for our children, no matter what time period you live in.

I let my children bond with their father as early as they bonded with me.  I have been thinking that perhaps men aren’t able to handle the stress of that kind of a relationship with all of their children.  The heart break that I have seen when the children detach from them in an emotional way, is different from how I have seen women handle it.

I would let the next generation wait a week or so to meet their daddy.  This way mom has the original head start and can interpret for the children and for the fathers how very fickle children are, especially daughters.  

They love eachother, but the dark seasons are really hard for the daddies.  I am sure that there will be reconciliation in the generation, but I blame the daddies helping them be born for the strangeness in the conflicts.  Just a thought.