In defense of God's Providence!

OH! The Wall Street Journal gave me much fuel for prayer for our blinded rich society. We are blessed with so much tangible and so little spiritual. I am grateful for the musings of a blind soul seeking the real message of Christmas in the pile of sentiment that is heaped upon us in the season. We are expected to enter in, mindless or spiritless and let sentiment lead us to the "Christmas Fare". It will come upon you, they tell us. One moment you have no Christmas Spirit and then, it zaps you. Does it? Did it zap Dickens, to write such a telling story as a Christmas Carol?

I love Dickens. I think the Holy Spirit moved him to write it, so that makes me bias in my debate of such a subject, nevertheless I retort.

It is true that the miserly and the extravagant duke it out in this season. The good steward sheiks and the giving tree advocates throw jabs at each other in this season using the season as a reason for their tackling the extremities. That is not what Dickens was talking about in "Carol". He was individualizing the sentiments for us and tackling them one at a time. Scrooge was certainly in a seared state and unaware of his souls desperate condition. Grief had made him thus. He had lost his true love. He had no family close to keep him attached to sentiment. He had lost his business partner who, at least had agreed with him on the benefit of ignoring the season, which may have brought about heart twinges that were too much to bear.

Giving was the fruit of a spiritual transformation that had taken place. Whose air are you breathing? To whom are you indebted, as the entire community is to your lending practices? God came to him with these questions. The spirits and the ghost of Marley were the truths of the shocking reality that life is certainly brief. He had a chance to see his eternal demise as swiftly approaching and have a change of heart. God arrested his soul and placed him in the shackles of joy, which are no shackles at all, but the greatest liberty in any realm. His griefs had bound him lifelong and were about to wrestle him into eternity in such a state and God, used the prayers of his nation and community and the testimony of a poor, content employee to convict him of his empty estate. "Oh, God, don't let that be me that they are talking about!"Scrooge implored. We all are with him in this ghastly desire. To have no one to mourn your loss, at last is not the worst state.

As we go about our Christmas traditions, please let us remember the physical, financial and spiritual disenfranchised, who live and walk amongst us. Let us remember that the season is joyful to some and is a savor of death to others, in its flagrant, bold truth that Christ is Among Us. He came to seek and to save that which was lost. He came to give us life. I love that no person gave Scrooge the gospel, per say. He was so seared that all that he had heard was calling for judgement upon his soul. Christ's Truth is everywhere about us. His conscience was so saturated that the spiritual warfare was within him. Let us pray for the many in that condition around us.

Grief is no excuse to miss Christ, but it often serves as an excuse to sit sullen in our sad state. Poverty is no excuse, nor is wealth an excuse to miss Christ in Christmas. We who are poor are giving the word of our testimony. That is what Cratchet gave to Scrooge. Who was won, without a word. His fruit of becoming a giver, means that he received the most important lesson that can come at Christmas time. We are the beneficiaries of the eternal life from Jesus and we owe more than we could ever give. God be praised that this truth is still pervasive and was shed light upon by this ancient delightful story of love and eternal life. God give us grace to receive it, in Jesus' name. Amen.

Working woman, where'd did you put my...

fill in the blank. The bustling house that we are in makes bumping into each other inevitable. I bump into you much less, with our conflicting schedules and your 2 new jobs.

I took your bulb out of your light in the morning and I wanted you to have a fit about it, so that I could see you for a minute. I knew you would wake me, if I was sleeping, or call me from anywhere, if you found out that I took your...Love you for your attention to detail. I appreciate how you always remember the little things that we need and that we do to and for you. I love that you put little lines in the drawings of our lives that make us who we are and what we are as a Walker Family. You are a very special woman in my life and I am very grateful for you! Love, Mommy

I am remembering Ruth this morning. I am angry that her pot is in the fridge, dirty. It wouldn't be, if you weren't working. You make a fuss about things like that. I usually don't and I realize that it is probably why you do. She was an annoying person in my life and I think about her everyday, because of her annoyance. Don't be that kind of memory to the people in your life. You are a wonderful woman and I think of you fondly. Happy Thanksgiving!

I miss my Grandma Today!

She took this picture. I remember it as if it were yesterday. I was a new big sister and we were off to the park. We stopped to show off baby Abby at Grandma's house. She said wait, I must take a picture! Why? was our thought, if we wait the courts will be full. Time is at the essence when you are a tennis family. Wait, she implored! I really remember thinking what a waste of time picture taking is. She sent them to where she wanted the photo taken and she and I scurried around inside looking for a flash for her "INstamatic" Camera. I said what do you need a flash for outside, Gram? It is a shady spot and the flash will make sure we get everybody clearly in the photo. I love you, Grandma, for thinking of everything. The courts were not on your mind at all. My precious baby brother's wondrous arrival was the most amazing thing and we have this significant picture to show off my pride at his birth. I miss him and I miss her, too.

Blessed Messiah!

Grateful for the new babies in my life...

I run to the daycare center to frolic with cherubs daily. And I remember that there was a time when I wondered what was the purpose of this life. Many, warranted and unwarranted beatings can wear upon a soul. As the bible says it discourages the child. Great Expectations movie had that plate in the corner that caught my eye that there are angels who lurk on the side of the room when a whomping is underway. I found a frame with that theme to remind me that there is a day after the whompings. I put Addie-Grace to remind me that that face was with me 50 years ago in my joys and griefs and now she gets to enjoy the beauty that got me through my roughest and happiest days. Same for Charlotte and the other nieces and nephews, but Addie is the representative of them and the future grands, Lord willing.

Learning to listen to me is part of weaning...Learning to listen to God is part of life...

Whenever I see the babies between 0 and 1 it reminds me of Hannah, in the bible. She taught her son to listen with his heart. He taught her that God loved him even more than she did. In the New Testament we have the privilege to follow her example with our little ones.

So many of the stories my children tell me about their childhood start with, I never understood this or that expectation that you had of me, or thing that you said. Today, I experienced it with my Karadyn. She came in the morning determined to clarify this time out process. It is a game to us both. My expectations, I try to make simple and clear. There are many things that inconvenience me, but only 2 or three things that will get consequences. I try to reserve my scary voice for dangers, ie. hitting the baby or touching the fire extinguisher. Time out is only for regular and consistent infractions of the 2 major laws...Don't touch the baby wipes and don't go in the pantry. Both are for my convenience, but also for learning to listen and follow directions

Today, Karadyn was attempting to dissect the loudness issue with me. She is very inquisitive and very smart. She knows that we have a rapport and she uses it. The lesson happened while she was in the walker. She can't touch much from the walker so she went to the fire extinguisher and I clapped my hands and said, get away from there. Her quizzical face helped me to understand her confusion. There is no time out consequence attached to the fire extinguisher, Why? It is attached to the wall and it is a sublime danger, but I don't want to make it a game, like the babywipes and the pantry. I am trying to detract attention from it and keep them on the task of investigating the room. That is a danger and that is that.

Maybe, she'll understand that tomorrow or later on in life. Clarity and consistency in my voice and my consequences is my goal.

The effectiveness of the tennis grunt...

Age slows things down...Things that took a second to do and to learn and to complete take much, much longer. Frustration on the one hand, but at the same time, puzzle pieces come together as well. My muscles go into autopilot on the serve. After about a half an hour, the body can do what it can do and can't do what it can't. I can't really run or hustle, but I can hobble.

I love how the coaches' words and instructions become deeper impressions on the activity. Where your toss goes and how you complete your motion all blend and become a unified presence in your action. You would run up to the box, were there a box to go to and hug all of the voices that have contributed to that excellent serve that you just did. Your mind prays for the living coaches and enjoys the sweet memory of the deceased ones.

Today, it was the American Twist Serve that I was concentrating on. I can usually do one or two and get them in and where I want them to go, but, not today! I was so frustrated about it. I had a little pain in my back and I blamed the pain on my not getting them anywhere near in. I love Nettie's low and quick toss. I tried a couple of those, to no avail. On the last bunch, with a gratefully warmed up shoulder, I tried to inculcate my oft repudiated "tennis grunt". It worked! They were all ace quality. I said, I guess I have missed an entirely useful experience of effectiveness for my repudiation of the noisy addition to my happy silent game.

I guess I will have to "Cry Out Loud!"

For the Love of POP!

Not sodapop, your father. Love him, would you?

Preview of "Professor Owl's Teatime"

I am so glad that you are with your father on that 10 hour journey through the cottonfields...

Thank you Emily, for your strict concern about the details of life in our large family. Sunday breakfast, who ate and who didn't, who has a project due, what is the timeline for each person's daily schedule. We look like we are taking it for granted, but we aren't and God knows what you do for us.

Thanks the most for driving those many miles to the Chowan, for us. Your service is appreciated and we are very grateful to God for you. XOXOXOX