I Love being 50

If I have the memory to recall, it seems that 50 is about the replays of the point. It is as though the great umpire calls a let and in your mind the points get replayed, only this time you have only your mind to play it. I would have run to the net and I would have hit a super topspin cross-court backhand, instead of that stupid drop shot. I see myself, as clear as day running to the net and being able to get under that ball and executing the shot perfectly. Then, I wake up. It is an argument and a 20 something year old has just hit me a dropshot that only a cross court backhand would be appropriate. I wouldn't hit her in the teeth. Insolence? No, just the age. You were that age before. What did Ruth say? "Youth is waisted on the young!" Are we in a match? Is the ball in play? Is there a match to win? Are we on holiday? Anyway, my bones hurt, as though I had a drill of lob backhands and loads and loads of overhands that I had hit, but I didn't. Just the pain in the neck from the children that God has blessed me with. I love that they bring me to the net. It delights my soul to put the ball away and not to knock the living daylights out of them. Some points they may win, but tennis {bless that game}gives me a certain perspective about the ball in play, with them. I tell them, You do not want to be on the other side of the net from me. You don't want me to put the ball away on you. That is surely what I always taught them when I took them out on the court. There is nothing more delicious to a tennis player, than a well placed lob to put away. It is instinct. I wanted them to see the natural way that I will put it away. You are my child and if you don't duck you could lose something. I want you to see that part of me. Don't give me that lob. I will put it away. They seemed to understand. Yet, and still they come home late and give me some stupid discussion about this and that. Elyse knows to duck. She sticks her head in the sand while the discussion takes place and Emily, {bless her heart} continues the rally without her partner. She hit a lob to mommy and she will get her head handed to her, if she doesn't duck. Yep. Well, thank goodness I was nearly asleep. My bones feel the pain of the match, this morning and there was no real match, just my imagination of points that I would have played. Grandpa's blessed "Hustle" yelling in my ear. Get to the ball, Jayne. There he is, in the building above me, yelling "Hustle!" Will I?

...Miles to go before I sleep.

My Father's eyes...

Being the first born, I do remember the days that my mommy and daddy were oogling at one another. It was so cute to me to see them enjoy one another. I studied their eye contact. They looked and blushed and enjoyed their young love so much, it was delightful. There were many delights that lit my father's eyes ablaze. He was a great admirer of all kinds of beauty. He could find delight in the interaction with intelligent, unintelligent, homely and painted women. He just loved people. His entire goal in life was to have his great grandma look at him as a good man. I think they did. But they were unswervingly honest. There were good men and rogues. They were sure that my father would be the latter. He tried and tried to stay true, although his emotions were not set in that direction. It surprised me when I saw the look on Fr. Manion's face talking about his mother's cookies. His eyes rolled back in his head, very much like my daddy, when he saw Yvette Mimieux or some other starlet on tv. Cookies? He looked me right in the eye, in church and he said no bakery on earth can match my mommy's cookies. First of all, he was very old and I very young. So, it was hard to imagine him having a mommy. We were delighted weekly or so with bakery cookies and my mommy could bake and cook, but the eyes that he made for these cookies is indellibly in my remembrance. I do love the look of delight on men's faces, eating and looking at things. In my meditations of these blessings of comfort that we enjoy, I think that the essence of home is the place where the twinkle in the eye meets the place where it belongs. The enjoyments have no or little negative repercutions. The closest to heaven upon the earth and the remembrances of love and treats at home are as much of God's lending Himself to us as we can stand in these mortal bodies. To look at the twinkle of the men in my life, Dad, Gramps, Dr. Lang, Mr. T., etc. are the memories that keep me motivated. maybe...

What profit is there for the godly woman? The presence of God is a treasure!

Why should I try to be a godly woman? Where is the advantage in trying to love God and live holy as a woman? So many questions come into the mind when you are trying to decide where is the advantage of knowing God in your youth. You feel like a sitting duck for the devil and his schemes. How will I ever get worldly wise, if I am following God from early in life? These are questions that lurk in the mind of the youngsters growing up under the grace of God and instructed early. You are early taught to see your sins and flee to Christ for mercy and pardon. You are early taught to prize the presence of God. Sometimes, we don't appreciate the presence of God, until we go into a far country. We don't recognize that we are blessed, until we live in a place without that blessing. Some people equate monetary blessing with the presence of God. That is what was the blessing of Rahab, in my estimation. She would never be deceived by such a lie. She lived in an oppulent society, without God. God is coming to judge our city, she would lure her listeners into her home to escape the coming destruction. Money is not a measure of blessing. Stuff is not a measure of blessing. The presence of God in worship and the presence of God in family life is the measure. Obed-Edom was that picture, in David's kingdom. He knew God. He followed the truth of God and God blessed his household. That is the measure. I can imagine that we will get to glory and see how much God longed to enter into our fellowship in our circumstances. How we shunned Him in our grasping for the straws of attainments? God's presence in our life is life indeed. His burden is easy and His burden is light. Learn from the testimonies of the godly elders that have gone before you and don't wait to make your calling and election sure. You have a treasure of godly examples and testimonies in your mindseyes. Don't despise such a treasure. Use these examples to launch you into pursuits and a life of love to God and love of His Word and a life of learning to live in the presence of God and with short accounts with man, but certainly with God!