Tuesday, December 11, 2018

"She Shall be saved?" What is our future salvation?

She shall be saved through the childbearing... If they continue?
Is every promise in the book mine? No promise in the book is mine if I am not attached to the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ. I believe that this is the deception of our era.
It resonate salvation apart from the covenant of church membership. Spurious faith as expressed by unattached humans to covenant of marriage and of covenant all agreements far and wide reaching. There is little or no protection from the elements of this world system of deceptions in our own strength if we are walking in our awn sins. we all too often are walking in our sins and the degradation follows us from generation to generation. The "Devolution of our race in the full light of the sun of God's entire revelation given to us and yet we would much rather walk in the light of our own expressions than pour over what is already revealed. we are not tricking our children and they are indeed calling us into question on al of our inconsistencies with regard to our faith. Why are you acting as an unattached Christian. why is your attachment greater to the things of the world than the things of Christ.

Which in regards to women, He shall rule over her. With regard to Her desire, Her desire is to rule over Men and this is far and wide reaching. God promises to subdue such unprincipled desires. You want to be the ruler of the world Woman! God says You will want to take over and do what you want all over the place. It is a Psychosis of Femininity and God has promises regarding this. He will allow it for a moment and then thwart it to the utmost. How much better to accept your position and usefulness in Scripture and do what God intends you to do? why don't we do this. We want our own way and we reap the negative consequences of such actions. God is not tricked by our wrong impulses. God is designing how we will be it back into place as He intended. God has a purpose for our creation and the more we kick against the pricks, so to speak the more we are reaping the sad unnecessary consequences of our own actions. God wants to be known by us. He has spoken, clearly in Scripture about what we are a how we should be acting, but we would rather create our own path of regulating principles.

We are looking for our own way...
Let's follow the move of God's anointing in stead. Be attached to God's Church.

Sunday, November 11, 2018

Watching my boys be boys!

I love watching the Gadsdens first crushes.  They are so disciplined in their lives and yet there is a carefreeness that they seem attracted to in the girls who are more often in trouble.  Perhaps it is the attention that their trouble creates for them or something else, maybe.

 I watched William's short stint of a crush with Rhema and that has fizzled and now it is Joshua and Kaylee.  There is something freeing that he seems to find in playing with her.  She has absolutely no consideration for rules, whatsoever.  She lives as though no person should or has the right to direct her steps.  She never sits or stands when the class is directed to and if there is a directive given to everyone, she is sure to go the other way. 

Thursday morning Joshua sat next to her, looked up in the air as he always does and said I am Joshua and then they proceeded to play together without another word said between them until breakfast.  They were dressing the paper dolls.  A game that few of the threes engage in.  It takes some observation and hand skill that isn't cared for by most of the children, but they found a common thread there and it was curious to me how two very opposite children could find commonality.

I am prejudicely suspect of only children by bias.  I hardly think them able to learn to really share, whereas children in a larger family have no choice but to share from their earliest moments of life.  I realize that my bias is wrong and baseless, but I haven't seen it really work out that only children don't take advantage of what is a rule of law for children in larger families.  All children are selfish, but it has long been my opinion that only children can only be understood by only children and multiples, the same.  The family dynamic draws out personality traits that are best kept to themselves, as I see it.  The concept of cherishing and mine alone is sometimes lost in a big family and needs to be learned and the concept of sharing and community like to the only child, in my opinion.

In any case, I was liking the personality sharing that was happening between Kaylee and Joshua.  He was feeling free in her freedom and she was learning disciplines she hasn't exercised before.  All over a couple of paper dolls!

Monday, November 5, 2018

Although we didn't celebrate Santa at Christmas, I can see how he could fit into the festivities

How Christmas might be a good assistant in child rearing?


I don't remember Christmas being held over our heads as children.   We watched the children specials and memorized the Santa Clause jingles in every form.  Somehow it doesn't seem to stick in my mind, a time that I said to myself, I won't do this or that naughty thing because Santa won't remember me.  We did believe in Santa and we did get good grades, but we also did naughty things at all times of the year, Christmas notwithstanding.
Since working in childcare, I have seen parents starting in September reminding and pulling out Santa as an impetus to progress and better behavior.  I didn't even think about that with my children.  I thought about truth and a lie.  
I thought if I tell that lie about Santa, they may not believe me about Jesus.  That was my only reason for not invoking his name.  We read his history, like Christopher Columbus and Miguel Cervantez and Horatio Nelson.  I forgot to tell them not to spill the beans to the believers in Santa cousins.  We felt sorry for the deceived children who couldn't find it in their hearts to try to behave for Galatians 6:1 sake.  God said it. There is forgiveness with Christ that He may be feared.  They didn't mean harm in sharing with cousins that Santa was a historic figure and that He wasn't actually coming down the chimney on Christmas.  They thought that truth was obvious.


Well there is something very sober about rearing children to try to be good for goodness sake and to expect good from God and ignoring the Santa motives.


Still, I feel I missed a great opportunity of investing in the imagination of my children in that season.  We have many special memories, but Santa was an aside.

I love what Santa represents in this time in my life.  I love the trout that we all know that children need multiple motives to behave and one of them is imaginary and special and all kind, unless you are naughty.   It draws out their own attempts at finding good and kind motives for younger people and maybe it could snowball into great imaginations of better and better motives to do good.  God should be enough, we know.  But, sometimes people need great imaginations of better people than the ones that they know to guide them to a good imagination of God.  That is what I have grown to believe about Santa.


"Eye has not seen nor ear heard, neither has it entered into the heart of man, the things that God has prepared for those that love Him."

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Thursday and Friday I saw Lauren's name in the sky...

Mu was on cloud duty again. I always am sure it is her, because she writes Lauren's name, very clearly for me. Just in case, you forgot to pray for Lauren I am spelling it out for you! I didn't forget, Mu. I am praying for Lauren!

This time the U in Lauren was leaking. I said why is the U leaking? I just kept it in my heart and mind of the U in Lauren leaking. Sunday was the answer to the question. Acceptable and Unacceptable was the answer to my question and the choir was totally in sync with Heaven, helping me work on my puzzles. That is how God works all the time. He places a question in your mind in the week and then He answers Himself on Sunday and you say, what if I didn't go to church, wouldn't I ever know the answer to the question and the answer is probably no. I can't tell you how many questions in my mind are unanswered because I wasn't in church that Sunday to get the answer to it. Some things you can't receive if you are not there. It is God's you had to be there moment with us. This time I caught it. I hope I remember not to miss it next time.

Wednesday, June 27, 2018

When the tried and true methods of napping them prove unsuccessful, what do you do?


I remember with an odd fondness, the tremendous sense of ineptitude that I felt with my Emily at naptime.   Each day was a wrestling match which I rarely won. When prayerful walking and rocking and cooing and cajoling didn't bare the fruit I expected my only recourse was to pray and play with her.  You lose, mommy she laughed as she saw me succumb to her antics. She insisted on tag, or hide and go seek in the house.  She wasn't a child that I could play the memory game with.  It was a challenge everyday and she kept me in the best shape of my life...   Some family exorcisms are successful and some are not.   My mommy had her hands ful with me and I received my remuneration with interest in my Emmy.   I am grateful to know that God saves to the utmost, whether you get them to nap, or not...

Saturday, June 9, 2018

what happens when somebody picks up the can instead of kicking it?

what happens when somebody picks up the can instead of kicking it?Much conflict, but much accomplished as well.

Sunday, April 29, 2018

how's your eye make up?

Put on the cosmetic of a meek and quiet spirit? Can I do that, Lord? Is that for me in this season of my life?

I will start with my prayer over my eye make up. Dear God, please help this make me look to you for my sustenance. Dear God, please help me adorn the Gospel with my behavior and what I look at as well as how I look. When I am made up, help me to be transparent and aware of the darker circles around my heart because of my sin, which no one can see. Help me to be more aware of not covering my sin before you than I am to cover those circles on my face. God, you know my heart is wicked and I would use the coverings for much more. Help me to be true to You! For the sake of Christ. Amen!

Saturday, March 31, 2018

Motherhood 101: I am not a professor, but I have a few things to say!

What my Daughter, what, daughter of my womb, what daughter of my vows!
Motherhood is essentially weaving!
Weaving dreams and hopes and desires into purpose is the consequential life of mothering. You give of yourself and you give up yourself into the loom of developing community, first in your home and then in your world. What can you do? What are you good at? Where can you use it?
Cleanliness is next to Godliness, but godliness is next to God. Are you next to God, or are you twice removed?
Some of us say, I have studied about God in church and temple and school and others say, I know God. Be the latter and teach from knowing God and not just knowing about Him! We are not dogs we are humans and there is a mental and emotional component of human instruction. when we divorce that from the equation, we create a species that God doesn't know of. They are human creations, just like many of my crocheted cloths. They can go in the garbage, and I would be sad, but no human should be in that category!

Friday, March 30, 2018

I really enjoyed our little chat, this morning.

Discussions that lead to talking about "Jane Eyre" are rare these days, with Elyse away. I was surprised that we were able to have a scripturally aware discussion about issues of supreme importance to our feminine ways without even opening the Bible. I love our relationship.

God loves women and He has a wonderful plan for us, even when we aren't aware of all of the hard trials that we may endure. That is what I got from how we traced the line of Jane Eyre's hard providences. It helps me see my own providences in a better perspective. That is always hard at Easter Time for me. I am grateful for your patience with my hard feelings in this season.

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Praying from the sideboard!

I feel like I am learning from the dutch women that I have observed to do my prayers as "Pray-Do's". A specific set of prayers that are in conjunction with the chores that need to be completed. ie. Prayers for cleansing, while cleaning, prayers for each child while handling their clothes and items, prayers for specific groups of people in the rooms that represent them. I am not always organized in my delivery of these prayers as they come and go, but I know that God knows my heart. The prayers from my sideboards are sometimes as neglected as my sideboards are. But when I get to them, they are a "doooozeee".

Today, I am praying for you, while I cut the ingredients for the soups that I made today. I pray that you are fulfilled and eagerly anticipating this wonderful new season that you are launching into, as you turn in your resignation from the movie theater. God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life and happiness. We are on your team and here for you, if you need to talk about it! Amen.

Thursday, March 15, 2018

Oh dear, Emily the Hobbit has me bogged!

Everytime, I try to read it it makes me sit in one spot! I know you can't understand this bogging! Chapter 3 it is the heather references. I am sitting in the heather. I want to buy a field of heather to read chapter three in. I want to sit there and look the elves in the face and say, what are you laughing about? Why are you so giddy, today? The movie shows a sober group of elves. They seem so wise and serious in the movie, but perhaps Tolkien was referring to heather to mean that they were drunk in that scene. I simply am stuck there. Why do I see a bunch of drunkards, Gandalf and the elves popping five and singing bar room songs? I am just sitting there.

Sunday, February 11, 2018

The Privileges of Singleness

Happy Travels
As you enter the last leg of your journey home from this excursion, there are a few things that I hope that you would not forget to thank God for, while counting your blessings.
Safe travels on the bus is my number one area of gratitude, each time you girls take on a trip.
Sounds like you had fun, even though you didn't go to Brooklyn. BUMMER. I was nearly tasting those exotic Brooklyn chocolates that I thought you might bring me home, had you gone there. It was quite by accident that I happened on that tourist attraction. I sent it to you from the NYTimes pages. The freedom to go or not is a wonderful privilege.
I do miss you intensely, while you visit here and there. But just imagine the wonder of visiting Grammy Jackie in her waning moments and what a great experience to pass on to others. The wonder of hearing her describe her time on the dock of the Jordan River to Glory. The visits from heaven and earth were awe inspiring. There is nothing like hearing her own words describing it.
Happy Sunday. Will see you in an hour or two, but in the meantime, count your blessings.

Thursday, February 1, 2018

The Privilege of being a Christian Woman in America!

Or whatever country you may go...
I grew up during the civil rights era. I saw women and men losing hope and thought that they would ever have equal rights with their white counterparts all over the country. If this was true in NY, it must have been more true in other states, where the covers of provincial behavior dull the senses to such things. Learning the glory and the beauty of walking uprightly and not thinking yourself above or beneath other people is an evolving view, on this side of Martin Luther King.

I lived and analyzed with the premise that all that my earthly father thought about "Blackness" was eroneous and not to be accepted. I did all I could to find what there was about "Blackness" was owned of God and blessed by His presence. At first, I imitated this woman, who I thought was the epitome of Christian virtue, including her posture. I came to find out that she had scoliosis and her posture was not her humility. It took years to find a balance of posture, humility and human pride.

How do they grieve with such hope? How do they praise with such abandon? Why does God seem so close and is that true? On the one side of "Blackness". And then, in terms of my observation of other people groups...Why do they have so much thought and truth exposed and not rejoice in these things? Why does God seem far, when they seem so penitent? Doesn't God own the truth that they are preaching? Why does God seem so far here and so close there?

God is truly the God on the mountain and in the valley, was my final analysis. God is present, whether close or far. He is present when we gather. He has given us all things richly to enjoy. The coldness of doctrine and the old things and the heat of present experiences, are both from His holy hand. We must accept and love the wonder of the presence of God in each estate. I don't know why it took me so long to see that very clearly.

Learn to love who and what you are. Walk uprightly and know that one day every valley will be exalted and every mountain and hill made low!

The wonder of living in a post civil rights era has lent my generation with some advantages of living apart from our cultures, if we choose to. Sometimes this was good and sometimes this wasn't so good. You can be so close to beauty and miss it. You can try to live a life that God didn't intend you to. You can despise many things about your own culture that God loves. I really don't know what that means for your generation. Not having lines of demarcation regarding your ethnicity. No Blackness, no Whiteness, perhaps this is good and perhaps there is no identity at all.

I want you to be the best woman you can be. Not the best Black woman, you can be. Although, I never want you to deny your ethnicity. I want you to see your ethnicity as your launching pad and not your limitation. I want you to enjoy the beauty of every culture, as if it were your own. I want you to deny the pitfalls of every culture, as if it were your own. Only in Christ can we do this. Enjoy the "all things richly" and only let sin make you cringe and not skin color or cultural mores.

Monday, January 15, 2018

Thoughts from Anna in Chapter one{when my heart is overwhelmed...}

Then I quitted the side of my sleeping boy, triumphant in his dreamless innocence, and sat defeated by the window, to crave counsel and help from the ever-present Friend; and as I waited I sank into a tumultuous slumber, from which at last I started to find the long-tarrying dawn climbing over a low wall and creeping through a half-open shutter.
I am fawning over the sense of resignation to providence that this woman took on such a task. Every teaching assignment holds a sense of fear and trepidation and leaning on the Everlasting Arms. I would say that your own children make your heart sit on the edge, with the awesomeness of the task and the promised judgment that God has uttered for those who place the stumblingblocks in their way. But the way that this woman, in her obvious grief took on a heathen nation's monarch and his children, with abandon to the grace of God, is amazing. From the first chapter where fearfulness on the boat made her quiver, she put it perfectly---
Craving Counsel and Help from "The Ever Present Friend".
Most times this is the only help in a chosen profession or task.
When my heart is overwhelmed!